Do you understand domestic violence? ?

I had a friend that was in a Domestic violence situation back when there was no help and she told me that the reason that she stayed was due to fear and shame of it all, she said it was easier to stay then to leave and leave to where she said, not to her mothers who would have to deal with the situation that she had gotten herself into, or tell his family, no she said because she was sure they knew about it since he would treat her as he was king in front of them. So she said he would her,but at the time she didn't know it was and she said what was i suppose to do, she said that the violence was bad but not to bad that she couldn't take it so she stayed and many times contemplated leaving but just as she did he would start to be nice and sort of change and that made her think things would be better, then she said there were those times that she said to herself that she made that bed so she now had to sleep in it. She said it was a love hate relationship that she didn't' quite know how to deal with it. She didn't tell anyone that he would beat her and since he never left marks on her face that he would hit her on her legs or arms slugging her and when they went out she was quiet so people just thought that she was meek and docile kind of person, not knowing that it was fear that kept her that way. She told me that once her brother out of no where told her husband that if he knew he mistreated her that he would kick her , and that day after her brother left that he beat her and kept telling her go tell your brother come on go tell your brother, she said that she never told her brother a thing and she didn't even know what made her brother tell him anything in the first place. To make a long story short, her husband died of Alcoholism and that is how she ended up with out her husband. To your question I do know someone who has survived it and is know married to a wonderful man and to your next question do i understand it, No I don't understand but my theory is that they are the few men that have the lowest self esteem and that they think it is the only way they can force a woman to stay in love with them, they have fear that they will not be loved forever by the woman that loves them and that fear makes them crazy and they end up making love turn the love the woman has for them into fear and no woman wants to ever live in fear. They sabotage the love that a woman has for them